I want to be durable and resilient, not fragile.

I want my kids to be the same.

Those qualities and the efforts to develop them take time and struggle and sometimes discomfort.

One evening recently I sort of forced a situation on one of my kids with this “development” in mind; she was NOT happy with me, cried, and wouldn’t talk to me the rest of the night.

I’m still sitting with that, trying to make sense and improve my approach the next time.

But my belief is the same. Durable & resilient, not fragile.

Further, the incident that originally spurred this bit also gave me more insight later, when my daughter shared what else she experienced during this interaction that I completely missed.

And her points where all valid. I mocked her. She’s right. I did. A reflex reaction maybe, but 100% not ok. Full stop. And she felt I had in the same period not been fair in how I also managed the situation with my son who witnessed the exchange. Also not ok.

And so I learned another lesson after the fact. I need to not be fragile in how I take candid feedback from my kids.

Agreed.