Reflections for Father’s Day

Reflecting on this day, worthwhile indeed, to say, thankful for this day.

Father’s Day.

On this day, funny thing, things on my mind. I think about my own dad, now gone three years. I think about what he was to me, really, so much, maybe everything, to me.

He helped me be me, the best me I could be. From the very beginning right up through so many struggles and obstacles and lessons and adventures and some victories too. He filled me with his belief and his love and his approval to be exactly who I should be, could be.

And now I’m a dad myself, times three in fact. And I want more than ever to be everything my dad was for me, be those things for my kids.

For sure they are the first priority, for sure I feel the need and the power and the ability to rise to the occasion for them. I want to empower them and guide them and fill them with belief and courage and faith to be exactly what they’re meant to be too.

They’re on the front end of their lives: we’ve thrown them quite a curve ball with a two household model now; but there’s no less the love for them, commitment to them; maybe somehow even more.

I know I feel more certainty and purpose and love than I’ve ever felt before. I will lift them up, be their rock, be the foundation on which they can stand and step out into the world; continually into the world, until my last breath this vision, this certainly is,

Is the most important thing I can do, for them, for love,

I’ve failed at love in some ways, failed marriages, love that could not be sustained somehow,

But this love, my love I feel and commit to with our kids, it transcends everything else.

Why do I share this on Father’s Day, or any day, in this blog?

Because that is the very purpose of these words, this blog, as a portal to share much of what comes through me, but not just for me, for you too. You too.

So Happy Father’s Day to my dad Howie, to his memory,

And to the many dads I know who are also my friends,

And thinking especially about another dad gone too soon, decades too soon, Happy Father’s Day Pat Welsh, in your memory too,

I hope I can be something of the dad you were to your three boys, greatness for sure in the men they’ve become,

And raising my glass and my prayers of love and thanks to all dads everywhere,

All power, and purpose, and love indeed,

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY~~

Flag Day, ‘85

36 years ago, 1985. I graduated from high school on Friday, that Flag Day, 1985.

There were 377 of us that day. I’ve known some of them since before high school; for sure on that day, I felt connected to every one of them. They were my first tribe. Kindred spirits, launched into the world on that day.

And we’re still going, most of us, anyway. And we’re still connected, some of us, anyway.

Grateful for that feeling, for those people, my tribe, everyday.

All of us with that common mark of Flag Day, Graduation Day, 1985.

Summer Season

Summer is just upon us and the kids are out of school. Last season we set up a tent in the back yard for a handful of backyard camp-outs. The plan is the same for this summer; maybe a few more nights even.

And as the kids have gotten bigger, it was time to upgrade the tent size too. And outfit the crew with full size sleeping bags. And bedrolls as well.

We are geared up now and good to go. Bring on the outdoor night sounds; bring on the breeze against the nylon walls; bring on the middle of night staring at the tent ceiling, when I wake up and consider how blessed I am to have these three kids in my life, to be their dad, to have this time, our time.

The pace changes a little for a couple months, the tempo and timing shifts, joy and a little freedom on the rise.

It’s summer season, it’s Tent Time, it’s OUR Time. Soak it up. GOOD.

Crackle

Radio sounds, waft through the house, from the front, from the back, same channel, crackle into the air.

Local jazz station, my radios don’t tune in so well. But I love it anyway. And I could stream digital but, would rather not. The crackle, something about it, from the past, like the music, reminding me of earlier times, maybe times with my dad.

Miss him, miss those times, feelings, the music helps, the crackle helps. Settling into now, content with now, the music helps, the crackle helps.

Yosemite

Things came together today. I’m pretty grateful.

I really want to take my kids on a summer adventure. My older daughter suggested Yosemite not too long ago.

Until then I had been thinking camper road trip. When she said Yosemite, the trip drew into better focus.

Yosemite. More than a thousand square miles of mostly wilderness. A blessed place. A protected place. A holy place, really.

I spent maybe ten Mother’s Day weekends in Yosemite; it was our family tradition growing up. I packed in the back-country maybe another half-dozen times when I was older.

I can’t think of a better place to bridge my child / growing-up experiences to my own children.

Usually you need to make plans way in advance, it’s such a popular destination. Covid Times, we’ll see if maybe I can get luck. A reservation is in process. We’ll see. Hopefully soon we’ll know yea or ney.

And so I watched Free Solo, about a climber who free soloed El Captain four years ago. I’m no climber; a minor boulder guy at best.

But watching an hour plus documentary centered in Yosemite? Just the primer.

I love that place. I love those rocks. I hope it works out. Even as one of the more popular outdoor destinations on the planet — and certainly here in the west, it will be peaceful, and change, and outdoor adventure, and exactly what the doctor ordered (as they say — no doctor involved just now on that front).

This trip, this place, much needed. For me as much as my kids. I need it. They need it. WE need it.

YOSEMITE.

Don’t know it? Maybe do, but want to read more. Here.

Snippets of GOOD

From an old friend, this quote, recently shared. I think it stands pretty well on its own. Enjoy. I did. Do.

“As long as we observe love for others and respect for their rights and dignity in our daily lives, then whether we are learned or unlearned, whether we believe in the Buddha or God, follow some religion or none at all, as long as we have compassion for others and conduct ourselves with restraint out of a sense of responsibility, there is no doubt we will be happy.”~ His Holiness The Dalai Lama

And the thoughts I’d woken up with that day, “What’s on my mind? Tolerance and love, patience and mercy, and just a spark of inspiration — wishing this for each of you, and the world, for the world, Happy Tuesday, peeps~”

Inside, Outside

Where we spend our time, inside, outside. Literally, and figuratively. In the world, in our heads.

Who are we outside? Inside? The same, or different…?

These questions churn through my noggin most days, challenge me, inspire me, forward, the stop!

Then forward again. Striving to understand, live the truth, each day, nudge, speed, forward.

Inside, and outside,

Ever forward. Ever forward.

Nighttime Banter

Nighttime banter, what’s the answer? Three little people, come alive, chase the steeple, as the nighttime wanes to bedtime,

What’s the right time to drop the hammer? Enough of the clammer, time for sleep, TIME FOR SLEEP.

Banter defined might inform, what’s the norm?

“the playful and friendly exchange of teasing remarks” ~

~ let them run a little as sleepy washes into the room, playful teasing, just a bit, then they’re easing off to sleep, then they’re easing off to sleep.

Nighttime banter, that’s the answer, off to sleep, off to sleep.

Listen, Lean-In, Love

Listen to the voices you trust, to those that inspire you, each day. Learn the lessons being offered if they resonate with you. Learn them well.

Lean-in to hard things when it makes sense. We can do hard things . You can do hard things. We humans, we are built for struggle, to overcome difficulties, to persevere. That’s you, too!

Love yourself; at the same time, as you hold yourself accountable, remember to also love yourself.

And love those around you who love you; and love those who need love; let the love you are blessed with power you forward. Accept it when it is offered; give it as often as you can.

Let it be so: Listen, Lean-In, Love.